The following conversation has been greatly censored.
"He's just so amazing." Lily gushes. I glance at Parker and Sam, already guessing their response. "Ok..." Sam replies, shoveling goldfish in his mouth. "Why are you showing us his picture?" Parker asks Lily. "Lily," I lean over to her. "What reaction are you expecting from guys when you show them a picture of another guy?" A blank look washes over her face. "Right..." I shrug. "Why do you like him, anyway?" I point to the picture on her phone. She just stares at me. "He's adorable." Right, in that 'I'm cool cause I wear my pants at my knees' sort of way. "Lily he can't walk normally because if he does his pants will fall down. He acts like he was born with saddle burn." She shrugs, shoving her phone back in her backpack. "Isn't that the guy who wears the weird pants?" Parker suddenly asks Lily. I give her a look. "My point has been proven."
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